Election Day Schedule of an American in Glasgow

Dearest Readers,

Being five hours ahead has never been so annoying. Below are some of my thoughts throughout election day, with my local time (GMT).

7:00am – Wake up. Realize polling stations don’t even open for another four hours. Accept anxiety. Wear all black to mourn preemptively for the sleep I most likely won’t get tonight.

9:00am – Sit in class. Be grateful for the distraction.

10:30am – Walk into the library and see Hillary Clinton on TV. Remember the election. Panic. Overhear Scots, Brits, and other international students trying to figure out what time they need to be awake to hear the results as soon as they’re announced.

12:00pm – Realize the polling stations have been open for an hour. Take deep breaths.

1:00pm – Stare at the clock. Do the math. It’s only 8:00am in the States. Have something soothing. In this case, Doritos and Irn Bru.

1:15pm – Wonder why Cool Ranch Doritos are called Cool Original in the UK. Is there another type of original?

2:00pm – Hear Gaelic. Say Gaelic. Wonder how to say “I’m very anxious” in Gaelic, but don’t know the word for “anxious.” Settle on “Chan do chòrd an presidential election seo rium” [I am not enjoying this presidential election.] because I don’t know how to say “presidential election” either, but we just learned how to say “I’m enjoying” and “I’m not enjoying” yesterday so I might as well use it.

2:05pm – Really hope I got that Gaelic right.

3:00pm – Welcome the distracting in-depth discussion about giving conference presentations and the group of texts known as Táin Bó Cúailnge.

5:30pm – Go to a mini-lecture for the school of Celtic and Gaelic. Have it opened with “i’ll distract you from the news for the next hour or so. Refreshing BBC or CNN isn’t going to get results faster, anyway.”

It’s still only 12:30 EST. Proceed to think about the election instead of Fionn mac Cumhaill.

5:45pm – Successfully focus on Fionn mac Cumhaill.

7:00pm – Walk home in the rain.

7:30pm – See that it’s snowing.

8:00pm – Make dinner while listening to the Game of Thrones audiobook. Successfully make enough for leftovers. Eat the yummy stir fry.

9:00pm – See that the snow is sticking to grass and cars. Celebrate by listening to Christmas music in the shower.

9:15pm – Type this so I don’t need to do any homework and feel less anxious.

9:30pm – Do some homework.

10:30pm – Go to bed. Take some melatonin to be sure to sleep. It is still only 5:30pm EST. Say to myself, “At least I voted. At least I voted. At least I voted.”

11:00pm – Sleep.

Your Bonnie Celtophile,

Dani

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